(Black?) Jewish Meditation

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I was reading a book on meditation. And I found an interesting old Jewish meditation. It consist of repeating the first word in "Hear O Israel, Hashem is our God, Hashem is One."

The first word there in Hebrew is "Shema".

In the meditation process, the meditator focuses first on the first sounds "shhhh" while exhaling, inhale, then focuses on the "mmmmmmmm" sound. Inhale and repeat. According to this method the eventual goal is to just focus on the "mmmmmmmm" sound.

I thought about that.

Many countries in Africa, the Caribbean, and many African Americans I know -when they have hard times to deal with and must distract themselves, they hum.

A humming sound like "mmmmmmmm"

Sometimes I wonder, perhaps it never really mattered what music was being hummed it was just the humming itself that had the power to lift us up from whatever hardship we were going through, whatever pain we were enduring at the moment, etc.

The Apology

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A hard part about living in Israel is that after being so accustomed to the ways of America, its hard to be in a place where people don't sue for things, there's no Afirmative Action type things, etc. One simply must rely on God and themselves.

Yesterday, as I was minding my own business walking home. Some two girls about ten years old or so said some racial slurs. "cushi, cushi!" (That word, in of itself is not a racial slur, but when said with a particular tone, its a slur). At first I thought to just ignore it. but they said it again. Then I thought, you know, for the sake of my kids, another black person who'll pass by here, my sister, etc., this just can't go. So I turned around to rebuke them.

They ran into their apartment. As fast as I could take my big ole self, I followed them, but didn't see which apartment they entered. Nevermind, I doggedly knocked on every door. Amazing what hormones can do. Finally I found the house and spoke firmly to the mother.


Without achdut /togetherness the Jews will fall. We are ever dependent on the rope tied by Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob together. We need every able bodied person to hold hands with one another and form a strong bond before Hashem /our God. It doesn't mean we have to agree on things, but to grow up jeering a fellow Jew based on... nothing, that is a great divide, a great separation, a great breach of national security. Yes, this may seem exaggerated to the non-religious eyes, I understand. But that is where we stand. Every religious Jew knows this.

So, I gave her a piece of my mind about how I think she's raising her children. And left it at that.

The next day, I finally told my husband. He, too, was upset about it and went to speak to the parent. They got our address and said she wanted her daughter to come and apologize. My husband came back with the news. Oh brother. Now I have to be the gracious one and forgive?! lol. But yes, I, too, must play my part in the achdut / togetherness.

It was funny. All day, I tried to imagine how I would receive them. Will I give them the rest of what I wanted to say, but held back? Should I listen dryly then slam the door on their faces as they ask for forgiveness? Should I truly clear my heart and accept their repentance? Wouldn't I want God to forgive me -or my children- for any wrong they should do intentionally or not? I tried to swallow. I MUST forgive completely.

Judaism does not teach that one should forgive AND FORGET. Just forgive.

I can do it.

The evening came and I heard the knock on the door. Sigh. I can do it. I opened up and there she was with two of her daughters. She asked for forgiveness and her children apologized. She even offered bamba (a favorite Israeli treat) to the children -but they were too shy to come and get it.

In the end of it all, I forgave them. This was easy. It was only children -albeit old enough to know better, but still children none the less. I wonder how it will be should I have to stand up to an adult. So far I haven't had to deal with that. Thank God -as in, thank God, the adults somewhat keep it in check.

Book Meme

Okay, I got tagged by Liz from Los Angelista's Guide to the Pursuit of Happiness, and so here goes. This meme doesn't seem too difficult.
This meme is book related and the rules are:

1. Pick up the nearest book.
2. Open to page 123
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences.
5. Tag five people, and acknowledge who tagged you.

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Alrighty then:

(1) Nearest book is Andre Walker Talks Hair.

Yep. As a black girl I am having a difficult time NOT putting hair grease on my kids hair. NOT putting their hair in braids all the time. I am just not used to white or semi-white type hair. But Andre keeps me in check.

But that is copyrighted so I don't know if that's okay. So, if its okay to cheat a bit, I'll pick the next closest book which is my prayer book.

(2) Page 123 -Got it.

(3) and (4) Next three sentences AFTER the fifth spills over to page 124 and it is:

For forgiveness is solely with You so that You may be feared.

I place my hope in (God's name) my soul places its hope and I await His word.

My soul yearns for (God's name) among those who long for the dawn, those who long for the dawn.

(5) okay, this is always the hard part. Tagging five people:

Siditty from Angry and Black since 1976
Tania from My It List
Soila from Unecessary Noize
(Hey Soila, I love the pics on your recent post!)
La from Tribute for your Thought
And finally, **gulp** Torrence from Raw Dawg Buffalo.

Yay! I did it!!!!

The "Promotion" Revisited

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I went into Daily Kos's blog to read more in depth what is going on, because it appears he REGRETS taking that horrible picture down.

I read this statement:

"But hey, for all the comments about how "disgusting" and despicable" the image is, the Lolly Gagging Fubars are the ones posting it on their website. LOL."

I'm not sure what to think. I think I'm tired. lol. I think I should not get involved in politics. This guy is laughing because though folks say the pic. is disgusting, many are still posting it up.

Why must it take me so long to figure out a matter?! I want all the answers right here and right now. lol.

Just kidding. But its very hard for me to figure what's the right action to be taking. My current guess (haha) would be that we should let him battle it out against his elitists and GOPers and then when the smoke is cleared, give a warning as to how insensitive such a despicable image is- in whatever manner one deems necessary to insure that it doesn't happen again.

Little Things Matter

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Today the installer came to set up a new bed for little Avi. His old bed was so broken, it was held up by a bin on one side and hubby's tool box on the other side. It was basically a board and a mattress on top.

Anyway, I warned him that I didn't have money to pay him when he came. But the installer said he would just come back later on tonight to get the money. Okay. But I had to give him some kind of a thank you. Since I was making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for Avi, I made an extra one for Mr. Installer.

When he was done setting up the bed, I handed him the sandwich on his way out. "Oh no no, its okay" he said.

"Why no?" I asked, "its a sandwich." I said in my best Israeli mother voice.

So he smiled and took the sandwich. I don't know who felt better he or I. Little things matter, I think.

Blogging Blahs

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These days its so hard to have a coherent thought. The last thing I want to do is blog about how thinking and blogging is difficult. Does every mother go through this?

So I'll try to focus on something else.

Want to meet the Ultimate African Jewish Prince? Meet Natan Gamedze. A true prince from Swaziland turned Orthodox Rabbi.

He's wonderful! And brilliant! But very hard to get a hold of. lol. Wait, does that make his wife a real J.A.P (Jewish American Princess)?


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I've added Black Women Vote! Podcast onto my side bar! Great talk show.

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I've also added some news sound bites at the bottom side bar of the screen. News (hopefully good) about what's effecting the African American community and also for the Jewish community as well.

A Pause

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Most times I'm not too too concerned with what others think. I mean, I don't want to offend people, but I usually stick with my own opinions. But today for some reason I had a pause.

Yes, I am black. Yes, I am Jewish. But what impact does this have in the blogosphere? Are there those who are waiting, just hoping for a valid reason to hate me -to use as a logical pretext for their hidden anti-semitism? Are there those who feel threatened at the things I believe in -or more precisely, the thing I don't believe in? Are there those who just can't believe that black and Jewish can dwell in the same body /space/ time/ whatever?

I never really explored this. Not sure why this thought came today. Hmmmmmm....